We all know that talking with your partner about difficult situations can be challenging. Often times we don’t know how to approach a topic that makes us uncomfortable or that we think might hurt our partner’s feelings. We can sometimes unknowingly trigger a reaction in our partner that is unexpected when we say something that sounds neutral to us but s/he hears it as critical. If you find that your relationship is being impacted by communication problems you might consider working with a therapist or counselor to help clear up some of the communication misses. As a couples therapist in San Diego I have worked with many couples who have trouble communicating with one another. They often say, “We really love each other, but we just can’t talk to each other without arguing.” I can help you slow down the communication process, understand what triggers anxiety, distress, and/or feelings of being criticized by your partner, and ultimately talk to one another from a strong, connected, warm and honest place. When you understand your partner on a deeper level, you have the information and ability to care for him/her in a way that makes talking about difficult situation less likely to turn into an argument.

If you are dealing with infidelity in your relationship you are not alone. Unfortunately, many couples have to face the difficulty and devastation that results from an affair. It is often a life-changing event for a couple; it is always a relationship-changing event. Your trust has been broken, betrayal becomes a leading emotion, one or both of you may feel that you have been neglected. You both may feel confused, hurt and scared. It is often hard to understand how you wound up in such a painful situation.

It is possible to recover and repair your relationship after an affair. However, it is not easy. There are many volatile, painful, and confusing emotions that show up. Sometimes you respond in ways that don’t make much sense to you. Working with a therapist can be critical for repair and recovery.

As a therapist providing counseling services in San Diego, I have worked with many couples who have come face-to-face with infidelity within their relationships. In our work I will help you, both individually and as a couple, sort through and organize your thoughts and feelings. I will support you both in sharing those feelings with your partner in a way that you can be truly heard and understood. I will help you figure out together how you would like to move forward in your relationship. Rebuilding trust, processing through the pain, and strengthening the relationship in a way that can help prevent this from happening again, or ending the relationship as amicably as possible and processing through the painful issues are some of the many options we can explore.
The outcomes are different for each couple. However, clients often feel that taking the time to deal with this in therapy is beneficial in many ways. Contact me today to get started on rebuilding. You don’t have to manage this alone.

Emotional upheaval often accompanies grief and loss. Whether it’s a sudden loss or something you were able to anticipate the effects can be emotionally devastating. In providing counseling services in San Diego I work with many clients who are suffering from the effects of loss. Readjusting to life without a loved one, after the loss of a long career, or the end of a relationship can be challenging. It often means having to redefine yourself in the face of whatever change you are going through. Having the support of a counselor can often make that process more manageable. Grief Counseling can offer support in coming to terms with the way life changes. Counseling can help you accept the things that feel out of your control.Sometimes, when we are grieving, we worry that our emotions might scare others away. We can then find ourselves not allowing our grief it’s full voice, but rather taking care of the emotions of those around us by shutting down our own. When you work with a therapist through your grief process you will find yourself in a compassionate, understanding environment where you can give voice to your grief and truly take care of yourself. With the help of a therapist you can grow through your grief, hold the memories that are special, and find ways to adjust to life in a new way.

Depression and Anxiety can strike at any time. Both can be triggered by specific situations or they can come on seemingly out of the blue. It can be difficult to understand when it happens. It’s a scary, sometimes very lonely feeling. When you don’t look ill it can be challenging to convince family members and friends that you are not just feeling sad or nervous, that as much as you would like to, you can’t just “snap out of it”. Depression and Anxiety are real, and have far reaching effects on the person who is suffering as well as the people who love them. Both can often be successfully treated with counseling or therapy. It can often be very helpful to have someone who can work with you and your family on understanding that these issues have a profound effect on the person who is suffering.As a therapist in San Diego I have worked with many clients who suffer the sometimes debilitating effects of depression and anxiety. I can work with you on managing and overcoming the symptoms, educating you and your family on understanding the disorders, and support you as you find your way through these issues back to feeling like yourself again. As a therapist I take great care in making sure my clients feel comfortable and supported in there work with me. Together we can set some goals and move toward them at a pace that is comfortable for you.It can be difficult to make the decision to reach out for help, however if you are reading this, you are halfway there.

When life changes, whether expected or not, things can start to feel chaotic. A new job, planning for marriage, building a family among other things, while positive and happy events, can change important parts of your life and make you feel unsteady, unsure, or anxious. Additionally, transitions such as divorce, learning to live on your own, or a career change bring with them some potential difficulties that can leave you feeling unsafe. I can work with you to begin to feel organized and confident again. We can work toward getting your feet planted firmly underneath you and begin living your new life with ease.

Are you trying to manage the impact of a trauma? Do your close relationships suffer because your traumatic experiences get in the way of you being close to others? It is not uncommon for those who have experienced trauma, either as an adult or in childhood, to find it difficult to get close to others, to trust them. Feelings of helplessness, being out of control, or fear can give way to coping strategies such as emotional numbing, and distancing in an effort to protect yourself from further emotional pain. When you find yourself wanting to make an emotional connection with your partner, but are unable to allow yourself to trust the safety of the bond between you, it can have devastating effects on the relationship. As a Therapist in San Diego I work with both individuals and couples who are dealing with the effects of trauma. I work from an attachment perspective, focusing with couples, on the bond between the two of you. My goal in the therapy session is to help create a strong, safe relationship where you can work through your traumatic experiences with the love and support of your partner. We can also work one-on-one. With a focus on processing your experiences and building on your own resiliency, you can gain the confidence to take care of yourself, learn to trust, and be open to deep emotional connections with loved ones.